Show more

Imagine the scent of cardboard boxes washing over you

What sins would children be punished for in a modern day Willy Wonka

If they didn’t want people to fuck the boat they shouldn’t have made the boat so fuckable

Welcome to my mastodon where I post all my thoughts

Excuse me why is the youtube app on my tv in Chinese. I didn’t ask for this

I paid my admission, if I want to watch this here tractor pull in my daisy dukes while eating this lollipop, that’s my right as a freedom loving American!

Just sitting on my tailgate in the Walmart parking lot,

waitin’ for my manic pixie dream Earl

Aires here, anybody want to start some shit for no reason?

Still proud of this clever and cute domain name tbqh

unfinished song 

The news: hey! care about the British monarchy!
Me: no

Show more

Welcome to your internet vacation destination: a chill place for nice people!